Update on my job

Dear All

Today has been a nice relaxing Saturday, this morning I decided that I was going to call Jane* at Poundland to see if there's been any progress in my application and to see if I had got the job, unfortunately the manager was away and she will speak to him in in the next day or so and let me know the outcome then.

I am feeling very positive that I could be working over the next few months and beyond, but she did the say the contract is for christmas temps, but she will be taking the temps on pernamently as three people have recently left the company. So potentially I could be working there pernamently. I will let you all know in the coming days the outcome and will be delighted if I get the job.

In terms of university preparation, I am adding appoointments in my diary and will be writing a view of the diary in the coming weeks on my main blog, once that's all the been done from a technical perspective. I still have problems with my provider 1&1. 

If anyone has any advice you can give me I would be very grateful. Please note, this blog will be altered over the coming days.

I hope you all have a good weekend.

xxx

Interview at poundland

Dear All

Today, I had an interview at Poundland in my home, the interview went really and I was really glad with my progress and my confidence as spoke to a kind lady name Jane* we spoke about the job role and what I will be doing if i was offered the job and benefits and work schedule and I was pleased and delighted that I could possibly work part time and go to the university in between and schedule fits in perfectly for me. I then asked about, when I will know if I have job and she said she will talk to her manager afterwards or Saturday and hopefully she will let me know but she was very positive and optimistic, which was good.

After the interview I felt quite shocked that, I could potentially work for a company as I had been out of work for quite sometime since I left my last company and I went home and waited for call from her.   I had a lovely evening spent some time playing Fallout shelter and preparing for university on my Ipad to take my mind off things.

On Fridays, the TV can a bit boring at times, so I am usually watching the telly in my own room or playing fallout 4 on playstation. Is it me or do I love fallout? The good thing about this evening, is that I have made a lot of preparations for university and I am also considering other distance learning providers for my degree in case things do not work out for my current situation.

Hopefully for the best things start to work out for me, I’m so determined to complete my degree one way or another. I still have a phone call to make and I will blog about them tomorrow.

Anyway I’m off to bed and nice evening

Ellana

My current situation with my studies

Hi All

Okay, so my current predicament with my studies is  in relation to advanced entry, for those who do not know what advanced entry is, it's when you obtain credits from one university and transfer them to another university and you are able to move on advancing years, rather than start at 1st Year again. I am still waiting for various in instituions to get in touch me over the next coming days so I can enrol and continue with my degree course.

It's been very a long hard road and now is finally when things get more serious,  in 2016, I was student with the OU and things were great, however I had pattern of procrastination and I kept putting things off. I didn't have much confidence in myself and I was very lonely and frustrated that I wasn't attending a brick university like other people I knew. So without realising it at the time, I kept moving my calendar around without really thinking much of it and would often leave assignments to last minute. 

I also found that I couldn't cope with the lack of structure and found that the student homepage, wasn't sufficient. Although we had schedule of what we was going to every week , i felt that even seeing three weeks worth of work was already causing anxiety and that built up over time. In the previous years, before it was modernised, it was easier to navigate and you knew from day one what you was doing however with modernisation of the site came a new set of challenges.

I also have problems with concentration, focus and attention span issues and these really played a huge part in being student. I felt that I couldn't put in enough hours and when I did put in those enough hours. It wasn't good enough and that hours flew by. It wasn't necessarily because I was lazy or I couldn't be bothered to put the effort in and I felt that my concentration, focus and attention was actually hindering my performance. I tried various techniques to combat the problem and was stuck in a rut.

So now I'm hoping to find out what is really causing the concentration issues once and for all and don't just settle because I am Dyspraxic as it can leave you feeling that there is not a lot that can be done and I personally feel it has let me down and there is more than just Dyspraxia to cope with.

What’s going to be different in 2018 Part 2

Hi All

As you've probably gathered, I  struggle a lot with concentration, focus and attention span and it's been a problem for such a long time that it's really starting to affect my life and wellbeing and it has been non stop issues and concerns.  So for over ten years, I have wondered whether if I am truly Dyspraxic and if there is something else that has been undiagnosed for quite sometime.

As I didn't want to speak to my GP about it as the National Health Service can take a long time for a diagnosis and I simply do not have time to wait that long and struggle. I have taken the decision to go privately and see someone about this issue. I could of spoken to Dr K about this, however she always assumes it's just part of depression, anxiety and also living with dyspraxia.

So taking it forward, I have booked an appointment with a Psychiatrist, Dr T  and I have  the appointment on the 8th September 2018, so watch this space.  I think that I have been undiagnosed and that I actually have Attention Deficit Disorder,  my memory is very limited in terms short term, attention span, focus and being able to think things through in an organised way.  I feel I cannot focus on one thing at a time for any period. Even writing a blog post, can feel running a marathon. 
I even noticed,  reading back some of my essays that there is lot errors and mistakes.  Things are not always clear in what I have written and I have missed a lot of appointments as I couldn't remember.  I sometimes regret getting into studying as I am struggling so much.

I just want to be able to function mentally and physically like every Jo Bloggs in everyday life and not have these difficulities.  So I am motivated and determined to change my life for better.

One other thing I have changed is that, I have created a journal for brain dumping information, I have this on my mobile and Ipad and its one place, where  I can store information and deal with it later rather thinking about it while I am working, studying or blogging.  Let's say you are working on a very long essay or report and suddenly the worry of something random happens, say you are "Did I feed Toto this morning?" And instantly, your mind is consumed by your spaniel being hungry all day and no matter what you do you cannot stop thinking about Toto and it's distracting you from actually getting that work done. Having a brain dump allows those worries to be put aside, while you focus your attention on that project, essay or report.  It also helps to let things off your chest and write down whatever is going through your mind so you don't feel too cluttered.

What’s going to be different in 2018 Part 1

Hi All

After numerous attempts at completing my degree, I am finally making the decision to complete my degree, however, there were a few things that I needed to sort in order to complete my studies. 


In preparation for university, I decided to sort out my health first, I was struggling with huge bouts of fatigue and chronic pain issues and there came a time in my life when it just got too much and I see someone about it, so in 2018 I made that my goal to sort out. I couldn't cope with the pain and not knowing what it was for some time and was really frustrated that I no ideas. I was given Pregabalin, as my GP knew where it was heading and it was heading towards to my nerves etc, muscles, fibrous tissues and tendons but needed that diagnosis and I were referred to rheumatology. I already had some idea what the issue was so I knew what to expect.

After months of cancelled appointments by the rheumatology department, I finally had my appointment on the 4th June and was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. It did came as a shock at first, but I knew for quite sometime that was what it was but I was also relieved when I came out of the outpatients clinic in Basildon Hospital. As finally, I could get some answers and some treatment and also it I didn't feel undiagnosed or that I was making it up for attention or psychological. I finally had a reason for my pain. I could finally say that this is what I got and didn't have to hide my pain for those doubters or people who didn't believe me.

Introduction Post

Hello All

Today I have decided to take the plunge and get started on my blog,  I started my journal orginally back in 2008 when social media started to take over in our everyday life. It's now 2018, I'm ready and determined to get back into blogging again. I took a long hiatus due to mental health reasons and now I am back as strong as ever.

My name is Ellana , I am 32 year old blogger , I am hoping to get back into studying this year as I was previously at the Open University and things with the OU, were quite difficult. I felt really isolated, despite having forums and I missed  the human contact brick universities provide.  So now I am my quest to transfer my credits to another instituion so I can fully complete my degree in Health and Social Care.  

I also struggle with Anxiety, Depression and Fibromyalgia, however, in this blog, I won't go into detail as this will be available in my future blog on Wix, once things have been sorted out.  

Watch this space for main blog in late 2018 and early 2019. :)

I hope this blog, will help launch life in a whole new direction, please feel free to ask me any questions you may have and I will respond.